Social Media Break?

I started this social media break with the intention of shutting out the noise. All. Of. It!

Since social media entered my life, I couldn’t remember a day without it.

I toyed with the idea, but years of FOMO, a bad break up, and jealousy I knew I had to control. I just couldn’t bring myself to break away.

Maybe I had finally broken through my lower level self or maybe it was the many drunken notes of “take a social media break while I read “principles” that finally broke through, but on January 1, 2021 I scrolled my feeds one last time and then hit the delete button on all my apps.

Somewhere inside me, I had found my reason to break all ties and shut out the noise.

Could it be that the deeper I fell in love with myself the stronger I became? Maybe the need to hear my true thoughts without the opinions of others became more desirable than my want for likes? I wasn’t sure of the answers and I had so many questions.

But for that moment I just lay and wondered did I have the power, the control, to finally let go and do what I thought I could never?

It’s been almost 2 months since I deleted the apps, and I am almost finished with my book.

A couple weeks in I started to ask myself, was I ever going to finish my book? What if I just gave in, it’s not like anyone other than my close friends knew about my commitment to finish this book.

But the more I wrestled with the thought the more I knew I was in too deep to give in. There’s a post it note on my fridge that reads “Winners makes adjustments not excuses” and it got me thinking…how could I adjust my life to fit 30 minutes of reading everyday?

With my already packed day the only adjustment to my schedule I could find was to wake up 30 minutes earlier. 4:00 AM.

Ahhhh, I’ve tried to do this before…but it’s so hard to snooze and every time I don’t get up I reenforce to myself that it’s okay to not keep my commitments. So how do I make this work?

Do you ever know the answer to your question but you don’t want to truthfully answer it because you know how hard it will be and to finally admit it would mean you found the solution you’re just to lazy to take action? Yep, that was me. I knew how to do it, but I didn’t want to admit it.

Successful people make the choices others aren’t willing to make, and they stick with their commitments. I am successful. Or at least that’s what I’m trying to convince myself of…so I made another commitment…an adjustment so that I could win and finish my book.

On January 31, 2021 I set my alarm for 4 am, and I plugged my phone on the other side of the room away from my bed. No snoozes. No excuses.

It was time to get real with myself. It was time to start living the quotes I post all over my house. It was time to stop making excuses for myself and just do the work that I know will make me successful.

As I write this I’ve had 2 great weeks of sticking to my commitment and then one whole week of sleeping in, though in my defense, the great winter storm of 2021 hit and we were out of power and water for 4-5 days….a blog post for another day. 😋

But I’m back on it…and like my commitment to staying off of social media till I finish my book, I am succeeding. Because everyday I make the choice to make adjustments not excuses and to strive to make choices as the best version of myself would.

It hasn’t been easy, but it’s been worth it. I have seen the world in a different light. I’ve noticed, I’ve listened, I’ve looked up from my phone and started to see all that was around me. I’ve found answers in myself to questions I’d been asking for months and I found the clarity to make the choices I needed too in my life.

I’ll be back in full force but this time with a different perspective and without losing this sense of being in the present moment and allowing myself a moment to soak it all in and truly experience life without all the noise.

I still haven’t truly discovered the full version of me, but the silence has bought me one step closer, so I’ll soak in my last couple days and remind myself always to remain present, here…loving every moment on this journey called life.

A.A